An unexpected Beautiful Journey

-raw & unedited. this was initially typed out the day before..but it was only 3/4 completed then.-

Its been a while since I've blog.

Tink i owe 2 important entries (on iman & my bandung trip).
Ok, i believe only 2 je lah. sounds like empty promises made. but I am the ikot-mood sort.

Me being me, now ikot mood. nak update on my hijab transition. =) yeay!
Alhamdullilah! Finally, me donning on the hijab and typing out an entry on it. say what? say yeay!!

Ok,serious stuff now.

Few weeks (months in fact) before donning on the hijab. alot of questions pops up in my mind.

I was asking a few of my close friends on their experience before and after donning on the hijab.

Their answers mostly were quite straight forward. Not that I dont value their explanation/ experience..but alot of thoughts went through my mind. Question like "am i ready for this", "what if I realized that I am not ready after i don on it?" and the most frequent pop-up qns is jeng jeng jeng.."what if my character/ behaviour doesnt reflects good on Islam"

MasyaAllah! May He frogives me for questioning myself alot for something that is wajib to be done more than a decade ago. I know its normal that we as humans we questions certain things in our life, but I too learn that just because its human nature,we shouldnt take things lightly. We still need to seek forgiveness from Him. No harm kan? ;)

ok, back to my story. I widen my "search for an answer" radius. Googled and googled. Watched YouTube on reverts to help me strenghten my iman too. (Had a convo with K'Erni - a close fren cum sister- abt reverts being more religious than us borned muslim. so I figured that I wanna feel the same way (or at least half) as they do. Watching YouTube helped. :) Alhamdullilah! I wont say that suddenly I turned into Hulk Hugan or Mighty Mouse..but it was a gradual growth in me. I felt that! (I will be lying if there are no parts that made me wanna skip/ fast forward. My attention span is pretty short. But there were many parts that touches the tiny meat/ muscle inside of me - the heart).

And I stumpled upon this blog (below is one of the entries which touches me)..which answered some of my doubts, etc. http://www.igotitcovered.org/2009/05/13/muslim-girl-my-inner-struggle-for-hijab/ .

After much persuasion, I was determined that I was ready to don on one. This happened in Dec. Told my parents about my intention. But who was I to kid. I "back-out" on the day that I assigned myself to. Reasons. I had reasons. Excuses one may say. Kita hanya mampu merancang, Allah yg menentukan. I wasnt ready deep dwn inside. :(
It saddens me actually coz I made my intention known to my parents (even gave the them the idea that i will don on tudung on our Bandung trip). Mcm disappoint em with my bad results. eeks!
So from then on, I decided to keep my intention low.But I continued reading entries from other muslimah.

9 Jan 2012. The day when I told my coliqs and bosses that I will don on one..this time no given date. I merely say "sooner or later". On that particular day, I can say that I took an extra effort to dress up, wore a dress with leggings. its different from my everyday-gal-next-door- look. ok, compliments. received alot of compliments..even from the boss whom seldom compliments me. The compliments and "look" from people made me a little bit uneasy. A sudden urge to just cover up (at this pt it was just a mere tot of grabbing a cloth and wrap mysef like a dumpling). Few hours later, I just made up my mind that I will don on the tudung the next day. =) Not much persuasion needed to be done. Even the tot of "what if I had nothing nice to wear tmrw?" didnt even strike my mind. I was more thinking about "i need more pins, brooch!" heee...

MasyaAllah, kuasa Allah kan. Just like that and He made me made up my "nagging mind". tak yah susah2.

and syukur Alhamdullilah, 10 Jan 2012 was the first day I don on the hijab. and now, the current blog that i frequent wave hi to is http://www.hijab-scarf.com/

trendy pple donning on the hijabs. =)

Thats it on my transition. Thanks for letting me share my beautiful journey here. lengthy entry i know. somewat dry, i will try to add in more seasonings to my entries yar. ;)

For the hijab-ers (including myself) and the future hijab-ers, May the journey that we will be going thru be a smooth one. Amin! And may our objective of donning on one, be a sincere one (for Him) and meets His requirements as well.

Talking about His requirements, insyaAllah, i will blog in regards to it. To keep myself reminded & for the sake of all sisters including myself. Amin.