seeking His guidance

"We have veiled their hearts and
sealed their ears so that they cannot understand.
even if you call them to the right path,
they will never accept
guidance"

(Al-Quran. The Cave 18:57)

Dear Allah, please provide
us with Your guidance.Do not let us be like them.Amin!

I wanna publish a Book

Some of us have the tendancy of thinking too deep on a simple issue.
e.g. someone acts indifferent towards you. and you think "why he/she reacts that way to u"

and so i want to write a book. on how to stop thinking too much/ deep into it.
a simple book for the hard core mind.

Page 0ne
"u shldnt have thoughts of reading this book anyways"

Page Two
"The End"

my needs

need to start my excercise regime again. been slacking since.....(ouh dear!) July.
thats 4mths!!!!
ok, bye!

departure of my hamsters

the youngest sis just texted me that another one of our hamster has died.
earlier this year, the most active hamster, Junior also passed away.

They were both 3yrs plus old.

came to realize that eversince Sabrina (the hamster that I adored/ love so much.) died, i no longer am attached to any other hamsters that we owned.

stroking her. playing with her. talking to her at night (maybe I did?).

the day that I wont forget is when we sent her to the vet, while waiting for our turn, she pooped on my hands. and her poo is green. she was critically ill then.
subconsciously, i have decided that i do not want to go through the feeling of lost.
the day she died, i was at work. lucky for me, that day i was seated at my coliq's seat. hence no one saw my tears.

adik brought Junior home soon after. and even asked me to named her.
come to think of it, i think adik thought that Junior might replace Sab. Maybe it did lessen adik's pain. but for me, i was adamant not to go thru this again.

To my 2 lovely hamster (Junior and Hitam) whom I seldom spend time with. deep dwn inside I do love the both of you. I wished I had build an affection towards the both of you. but i wasnt ready then.
now, i do wonder if that was the best decision. coz instead of crying my hearts out of your departures now, i am feeling guilty.

tick tick toocck!

its been 26 days since Steve Jobs passed away.

8 months since the biggest Tsunami hits Japan.

9 years since the 2002 Bali Bombing.

how time flies. so fast.
reflecting back, it scares me abit.
time, precious time. how fast it just slips away from me.
how I allow it to just be wasted just like that.

been nearly a year since I blogged.
reading back the entries, it just set me thinking.
I wont dare to say that I have made full use of the time He have given to me.
Neither do I want to say that I have not done anything at all.

Time ouhh precious time!
anws, its quite good hah, having a blog/ diary, somehow u tend to recall back the past.

and see how far and how much you have learnt..abt yourself, others and things ard u.

in case any of you is wondering about about my anxiety...its still with me.
sometimes, somethings are better off to be accepted as it is. nope, not that i have decided to let it be.
and live in horror everyday, pondering about whatever nots.
I have learnt to do more readings about it. And, Masya'Allah He showed me more than ways to accept "the flaws".
I have learnt more about others too (not anxiety).
there's a reason as to why He put me through this. And whatever you are going thru right now, He will show you the way out.

Hah! if you talking about your faith and beliefs in Him.

How the faith decides to go on a "singapore flyer" tour. Keep a lookout for my entry ya.
coz i believe i will blog abt it soon (insyaAllah). cause, i was at the entrance of the "s'pore flyer capsule" just few hours back.
Not that I have the remedy for it, I just wanna share. and say "weii, u are not alone man. you are normal. cause I hope to think that i am normal too."

ok, lets stop here. and re-read my entry before publishing.
i have the tendency of repeating a word often. :)